Let’s face it: the Rock n’ Roll Hall of Fame is sort of a commercial sham. Yes, a gorgeous building on the Cleveland waterfront, and yes, a needed effort to curate an undeniably fab bit of our of culture, but those inductions? They feel random and oddly political, like a bunch of cobwebbed writers from Rolling Stone mag all sit down with a keg and a bottle and cast lots for nominees. KISS, overlooked. Grand Funk, the same. Now this year, the whiner narrative crown is going to Axl Rose, a fractious talent who has never regained traction since Guns N’ Roses fame. While “Appetite for Destruction” remains on our top-rock-records-of-all-time list, it seems Mr. Rose has declined to show up for the induction alongside his former group, which rightly was selected this year. Seriously bro? One night, to honor your accomplishments with the band? Here is his statement.
As one Facebook pal said: Rose and Hole singer Courtney Love ought to be locked in a house for a whack rock and roll tumble. That’d be must-watch reality TV, no? Courtney, BTW, is back in a cyberbrawl with her now-grown daughter Frances Bean amid mom’s long-standing issues with Foo Fighter Dave Grohl, who long ago got his start in a little Kurt Cobain-fronted crew named Nirvana. Memba them? Ah, rock stories. We just can’t get enough of them. As a music prince once sang: “I know, it’s only rock and roll, but I like it….” Yes, I do.
Do you think Hillary Rosen is hunkered down in the Casey Anthony-George Zimmerman media-dodge bunker? Until the news cycle moves on to something more pertinent? Her knuckle-dragging cracks against Ann Romney this week about women and work certainly took the Trayvon Martin story off the front pages. It’ll be back in late May when Zimmerman is arraigned, especially if he gets bail. Given the altitude of this case, that seems unlikely. Le sigh. BTW: Where is Casey Anthony? She’s been quiet for far too long after a series of leaked vlogs. Will Rosen, who finally apologized, be looking for city hall clients in East Los Angeles amid this damage to her professional reputation, or is she now a quiet hero of the left? Time passes, some forgive, others… no so much. Definitely opens a great hole for the GOP. #lacksgeneforselfcensorship
To wit: “A person often meets his destiny on the road he took to avoid it.” ~ Jean de la Fontaine
Stephen Colbert to First Lady Michelle Obama: “Do you ever lord over the president the fact that you are more popular than he is?”
Sarah Palin’s Miss Kitty hair is gone. Hooray. Embroider this on a sampler, chicas: Sometimes a makeunder works wonders. It does.
In other follicle news: Purple-haired rock spawn Kelly Osbourne – or is that shade nursing-home gray - says she’d tell the now-curvaceous songbird Christina Aguilera she is fat, in a snappy little celebu-tit-for-tat. Once they get skinny, they have no compunction going after the chubbies, no? Sez fashion star Kelly to PEOPLE magazine: "She called me fat for years ... now [she knows] how it feels.” Meow.
Dear Corey Booker (secret political love crush): Running a difficult city. Hard. Dashing into a flame-engulfed home to save an elderly neighbor lady from certain death? Priceless. As we say in my home state: Bless your heart.
To our ever-growing list of federal agencies we’d like to disband, we’ve added the GSA. Nice videos, clowns. You should be forced to pay us all back for your Vegas party trip. Or lose your jobs. If we were president your wages would be docked. PS: Rap this.
Speaking of creeps: Pro hoopsters Dwyane Wade and Ray Allen think that NBA players should be paid to play in the Olympics. Wow. Nice guys AND patriots. #greedmongers
Our best Tweet of the week award goes to John Hanna, a Flash developer from Texas, who wrote: “If John Edwards is convicted, I hope he's not a cellmate with Rod Blagojevich. One of 'em is gonna get shanked over ownership of the comb.” Jury selection in the Edwards trail continues in Greensboro, N.C. BTW: the two-timing Breck Girl still looks nice in a suit. Handsome and sad.
Wonder how many babies born this year will be named Katniss?
We find ourself agreeing with President Obama, who weighed in on Kanye West: a talented “jackass” said the prez. Perfect description.
Actor John Cusack Tweets of playing Edgar Allen Poe in the film adaptation of The Raven: “I’m thinking about old Edgar as the film’s coming out and am promoting it but I really hope it inspires people to read him again at very least.” True that, sayeth the Raven.
So newspaper reporter is No. 5 on the worst jobs list according to careercast.com? Well, hey. At least we’re not tied down in some tech cubicle writing code or locked in some law firm dying a soul’s death to bill those 50,000 hours this month so in eight years we can beg for a partnership – so we can work 20 more soulless years, all for the pleasure of owning a Bethesda townhouse and fighting traffic. AS IF.
Two bad boys of cinema are back and mixing it up – actor-director Mel Gibson and screen writer Joe Eszterhas – over the script of an as-yet-unmade film, the Maccabees. The back story is complicated but deals with anti-Semitism, natch. Here now is their delicious correspondence (yow).
Speaking of films: We loved the Broadway show “Rock of Ages,” and its adaption of the fab tunes of the 80s bands, including the always delightful Journey. We can’t wait for the movie version, starring Tom Cruise and a cool cast. On that note, check out this cinematic video, the best of its kind making the rounds of cyberville this week:
Kudos to the University of Arkansas athletic director who bagged head football coach Bobby Petrino after he paid his 25-year-old mistress off and hired her, ostensibly so she wouldn’t be tempted to tell of their affair. Have ya seen this guy? Yes, he was a successful coach, but who’d date him? Even for money. Gag reflex fully engaged.
And finally, a weekending happy: "Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all." - Dale Carnegie
