Pregnant Criminal Scurries Across Border, Cuts Umbilical Cord With Nail Clippers, Makes Baby a U.S. Citizen

Here’s an inspiring story of everything that is wrong with our current system of giving citizenship to anyone who is born on US soil, regardless of circumstances.

The Associated Press reports that the Border Patrol intercepted a group of three immigration criminals “in distress” after sneaking across the U.S.-Mexico border into the Arizona desert.  Just 25 miles from the border when captured, the group included an 18-year old woman of unknown nationality who had recently given birth.  The group claims that the birth occurred on the U.S. side of the border and that the woman, who was just endangering the infants that no American wants to endanger, cut the umbilical cord with a pair of nail clippers.

The child is thus a U.S. citizen, can never be deported or denied re-entry, and is eligible for food stamps, welfare, Social Security, public education, Medicaid, subsidized housing and to apply to have her entire family join her in the United States, legally.

Mother and child were taken to a local hospital, where they are doing fine, and not paying for a thing.  But that’s OK, because you can pay for it, you stupid American suckers.

As anyone who has ever worked in a border state hospital can tell you, every year there are thousands of illegal alien mothers that sneak across the border while pregnant specifically to give birth inside America and make the child a permanent citizen.  But can you blame them?  We make our rules.  No other major country gives away citizenship based on geographical happenstance or a few hours of well-timed criminal trespassing.  We beg to be scammed, and we are scammed.

Might I suggest the name “Jackpot” for the new baby?