Water is totally over-rated

Liberals love to be concerned. About you. About me. About the animals. About the earth. And especially about themselves and their beloved bodies.

Michelle Obama’s newest initiative is a notch in the belt of health alarmists. She’s spoke today in Watertown, Wisconsin, where she pushed her latest campaign, “Drink up!” (the slogan having been too banal for Natty Ice). Michelle and her hydrated crew are encouraging Americans to drink “even just one more glass a day.”

Sure water is good for you and pure and all that. But let’s be honest: it’s just a good base. Bread and water make a great team providing us the basic nutrients we need to sustain ourselves, but where are we, prison?

Michelle’s Drink Up! program is as worthless as it is annoying. Well, almost. Every time I see the Let’s Move! slogan, and now this Drink up! command written, three of the most irritating types of people in the world come to mind: camp counselors, mannish phys. ed. teachers, and fraternity brothers during rush week.

Sam Kass, White House senior policy advisor for nutrition policy, said yesterday that “40 percent of Americans drink less than half of the recommended amount of water daily.” The Atlantic points out, though, that “there is no recommended daily amount of water.”

Michelle isn’t explicitly telling people to choose water as a healthier option over soda (she’d have a booming industry to contend with), nor is she recommending we drink a certain number of fluid ounces of H2O that has been prescribed as a proper portion for optimum health. She’s just saying, “Drink more water,” because, I guess, who’s going to take issue with that?

Are Americans really going to exercise or drink more water because the First Lady wants them to? It reminds me of those pointless signs on the highway that say helpful things like, “Don’t drive impaired.” Oh, you know what, come to think of it, you’re right. Let me go ahead and screw the lid back on my Wild Turkey 101 and toss it in the back seat for later.

The mentality driving Drink Up! is in line with a long list of other cautionary liberal schemes that attempt to address and regulate a problem that isn’t there. Are we all walking around thirsty and dehydrated without knowing it? Libs are probably also behind the arbitrary age requirements for drinking alcohol, though European kids already have a good handle on handles well before we American youngsters are allowed to look at booze, and the only bad effect we can detect are fashion trends that out-ugly even ours.

When libs can’t find a problem to “fix,” they create a new one. Motto: Never let a crisis go to waste, and if you have time to waste, create a crisis.