Profiles in Cluelessness: Wall St. Protesters Beclown Themselves

In the event you’ve been busy leading a productive life and haven’t noticed a motley bunch of human debris protesting in Lower Manhattan the past couple of weeks, this loosely-knit band of miscreants have been railing about capitalism and the evils of Wall Street or something. They apparently want to see the end of our current financial system in order for it to be replaced with some Utopian Shangri-La where everyone chips in and we all live in harmony.

But who really knows? Few of them can even coherently answer a question, let alone articulate what they’re actually doing.

On Friday we saw humiliation on a grand scale, as the so-called organizers promised the unwashed horde that the band Radiohead would show up and play for them, but that didn’t quite work out as planned.

Radiohead didn’t rock out with the Occupy Wall Street mass yesterday, but the crowds sure did as the protest marched into its third weekend – but had a little trouble finding NYPD headquarters.

The British rock band’s rumored appearance at the downtown protest – later branded a “hoax” by organizers – swelled the ranks at the Zuccotti Park base to several thousand.

While hundreds of people have camped out overnight in the plaza during the two-week old sit-in for social change, an online announcement that Radiohead was en route jammed the plaza.

“I actually think it’s kind of ridiculous,” said a dreadlocked 20-year-old who identified himself as Pigpen. “The only reason 500 people are here is because they think Radiohead is going to be here.”

Organizers were red-faced.

“I got hoaxed,” said Patrick Bruner, who has been e-mailing on behalf of the Occupy Wall Street protesters. “Radiohead was never confirmed. Completely our fault. Apologies.”

Not content with that humiliation, these idiots then came up with the brilliant idea to go march on NYPD Headquarters, where apparently the plan was to have the police surrender by dying of laughter.

Hilarity ensued.

A crowd of more than 2,000 people marched up Broadway, past a closed City Hall Park, under the arch of the Municipal Building and massed outside what some mistakenly thought was NYPD headquarters.

But most of the chanting horde plopped down in front of One St. Andrew’s Plaza, which houses the U.S. Attorney’s Office, not the NYPD.

You just can’t fix stupid. Actually, calling them stupid may be a gross understatement. Check out this video from The O’Reilly Factor from Friday evening. Mind-numbing idiocy as art form.

If the rich were willing to share, we could all live in prosperity? Why hasn’t anyone thought of that before?