Weiner Boils Slowly


Only the most gullible observer would have been willing to believe Anthony Weiner (D-Twitter) was telling the truth during his big press conference the other day.  The man is a pathological liar.  He only gave that press conference because he was forced to do it.  A basic knowledge of human nature would suggest he told exactly as much of the truth as he felt necessary.  Heck, you could almost see him squinting his teary eyes and rolling the dice at the end of the conference, as reporters were still dragging stuff out of him while he tried to leave.

Within hours of the press conference, we already knew he was lying through his teeth about not coaching any of his gal pals to lie to the press, as porn star Ginger Lee told TMZ he had done exactly that.

Now we’ve learned that his insistence upon not having engaged in any actual inappropriate sexual activity (at least not with anyone else) (God, I’m sorry for conjuring that image!  Please forget everything between the previous set of parentheses) might have been technically true, but it wasn’t for lack of trying.  Radar Online has published a trove of naughty text messages Weiner wrote to Nevada blackjack dealer Lisa Weiss during September 2010, in which he made plans to hook up with her.  (Warning for those tempted to follow the link: I do mean naughty.)

“i’m ready for a vegas trip, truth telling during the day, got a night plan for us?” the suave Congressman asked his Internet paramour, so excited that he forgot his capital letters.  He went on to tell Weiss just how much Weiner she would be dealing with during their tryst.  Our days will be so empty if the New Face of the Democrat Party resigns, and is no longer able to fill them with truth telling.

The sky above Weiner is filled with other shoes preparing to drop.  I think we’ve only heard from half of the half-dozen women he admitted to Internet flirting with, and that’s not counting the college girl he sent the Crotch Shot of Doom to. 

The water around Weiner is beginning to bubble.  House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi called for an investigation after his speech Monday, although that really doesn’t mean much by itself.  Such vacations take a long time, and the Democrat Party loves to give its crooks standing ovations for their courage after administering slaps upon the wrist.  Pelosi is mostly trying to give her caucus some cover while they work on a long-term strategy, and wait for the public to stop making Weiner jokes and go back to watching Barack Obama destroy the economy.

CNN notes that House Majority Leader Eric Cantor said “I don’t condone his activity, and I think he should resign,” while friendly Republican Jason Chaffetz of Utah says Weiner must “look at himself to make that decision.”  That’s the problem, Rep. Chaffetz.  He already spends a lot of time looking at himself. 

Chaffetz said of Weiner, “I like the guy.  I’ve gotten along with him. I’ve sponsored bills with him, I’ve done fun things on television and what not with him.  But there comes a point where you just have to say, ‘I’m sorry, but there is also some consequence to this.’  This is about the trust that he has with the American people and specifically the people in New York, but I just don’t see how you can go on from this.” 

“Consequence?”  Oh, come on, Rep. Chaffetz.  The man already said the magic words, “I take full responsibility.”  There are supposed to be consequences that come with responsibility?  Who made that stupid rule up?

Two House Democrats, Betty Sutton of Ohio and Tim Walz of Minnesota, have decided to distance themselves from Weiner by donating his campaign contributions to charity, while no less than Ed Schultz, the MSNBC caveman who called Laura Ingraham a “slut” on the air, thinks he should resign.

Others say the voters of Weiner’s district should decide his fate.  Thus far, their reactions have been mostly negative, mixed with the odd burst of astonishing cluelessness.  CNN quotes a “registered Republican” who thinks Weiner should stand strong, saying “he’s a human being… he made a mistake.”  No, he made several hundred “mistakes” over the course of months, and launched a bitter campaign of lies and character destruction to cover them up.  The next time you see one of those polls that says 14% of Republicans approve of the way Barack Obama is handling the economy, and you wonder who those people could possibly be, look to Anthony Weiner’s district.

When you get right down to it, Weiner staying put as the New Face of the Democrat Party is very good for Republicans politically – Rush Limbaugh said as much on the air yesterday.  But having someone like Weiner in a congressional seat is not good for America, no matter which party benefits or suffers.  He clearly has no control over his impulses, he’s a liar whose media appearances last week could be fairly described as psychotic, and he can’t be trusted with any kind of sensitive information. 

Given his determination to hold onto power at any cost, Weiner is a tremendous blackmail risk, if some sinister agency were to get hold of information that firmly implicates him in something like inappropriate contact with underage girls.  Is he still sitting on the immensely powerful House Energy and Commerce Committee?

The United States is not well-served by the presence of an outright laughingstock in Congress.  We all know our political class has some general issues with telling the truth, but some minimal degree of personal honor should be necessary to serve in high office.  It’s hard to see how a man can conduct the business of Congress when any reasonable person would assume that everything he says is a lie, unless conclusively proven otherwise.

Weiner’s already become a household joke, as popular culture fills the airwaves with genital humor, and the very sound of his name provokes guffaws.  Spirit Airlines has already used him as the butt of a joke in advertising cut-rate fares that are “too HARD to resist.”  Stick a fork in him.  He’s done.