Stop Environmentalists' War on Women

Maybe environmentalists thought women would be too busy to notice the growing regulatory assault on them.  They were wrong.  Nothing gets women’s attention more quickly than dirty dishes, clogged toilets, grimy clothes, toxic materials, and budget-busting energy prices.  It’s time the fairer sex took environmental Neanderthals head-on.

Twentieth century capitalism gave women marvelous innovations—from reliable electricity and the countless household machines they power to abundant cleaning products—that make domestic chores easier, faster and more efficient.  These time-saving conveniences enabled women to multitask as never before, giving them sufficient hours in a day to simultaneously manage homes, raise children, pursue intellectually challenging careers, and stay in touch with family and friends.

But environmentalists and their government-regulating minions are quietly and methodically reversing women’s progress with an onslaught of absurd regulations of highly dubious value.

Low-flow toilets developed to meet government water-saving standards are a chronic irritant.  Posted above each toilet in our office is the plumber’s advice:  “Flush 3 times: once for your business, once for the paper, and once to clean the pipes.”  No water savings there.

Front-loading clothes washers are likely to be the next headache for women.  Bowing to Department of Energy efficiency standards, manufacturers switched to front-loaders, reports the Wall Street Journal, “because they don’t fully immerse their laundry loads [so] they use less hot water and therefore less energy.”  Yet they’re more “expensive, often have mold problems” and Consumer Reports testing found that “they didn’t clean as well as the 1996 [top-loading] models.”  Incredibly, a Senate committee is now considering even more “stringent” efficiency standards.

Expect clean dishes from a dishwasher?  Don’t.  Thanks to environmental laws enacted in 17 states, national manufacturers have reduced the critical ingredients in dishwasher detergents—phosphates, which dislodge food particles from surfaces—from almost 9% to 0.5%.  The result:  Dishes and flatware come out speckled with heat-encrusted food particles.  The only way to ensure clean dishes is to prewash them by hand, which uses more water and energy.  Oh, and the environmental gain to lakes and rivers?  Miniscule, because so little of the phosphate pollution originated from dishwashing detergent to begin with.

The government banned chlorofluorocarbons (CFCs) in home heating and air-conditioning systems in the 1980s on environmentalists’ claims that CFCs caused ozone-layer depletion.  Mother Nature fooled them.  Scientists reported in April that the Arctic’s ozone layer thinned by 40% last winter, due largely to extremely cold temperatures.

Undaunted, environmentalists are now attacking CFCs in hair spray, air fresheners, furniture polish and other aerosol products, along with refrigerants in auto air conditioners.  Some propose using propane as a substitute refrigerant in vehicles, with little concern that propane can be explosive if mixed with air. 

Environmentalists aren’t concerned, either, about the millions of homes that will be forced this year to switch to compact fluorescent light bulbs (CFLs) containing toxic mercury.  Women surely should be.

Author and retired environmental cosultant Edmund Contoski has compiled an extensive list of CFL risks, including bulbs spontaneously bursting and causing house fires, broken bulbs releasing 20 times the acceptable mercury level, the emission of ultraviolet rays that damage upholstery fabrics, flooring finishes, photographs and oil and acrylic paintings, and illumination value and bulb life half that promised.  Warnings associated with CFL bulbs range from the important—cancer-causing chemical emissions during use and hazardous waste-type cleanup of broken bulbs—to the irrational: one state agency recommends CFLs not be used in children’s rooms or rooms with carpets where children play.  Aren’t those rooms normally part of what’s called “a home”?

Now the EPA is considering a ban on triclosan, a critical Food and Drug Administration-approved ingredient in antibacterial soaps, trash bags, toys, tennis shoes and cosmetics, reports Smart Girl Politics, a group that’s started a petition to stop the EPA ban.  Meanwhile, the Department of Energy is drafting new refrigerator regulatory standards to rein in evil ice-makers, which use more energy than global warmists think they should.

Environmentalists dream of a pristine world of nature, conveniently ignoring that cave-dwelling was nature at its most pristine.  These wannabe Neanderthals hate almost every reliable source of energy, preferring to substitute windmills and solar panels for Mother Nature’s own.  And if those windmills don’t spin and solar panels don’t collect, well, honey, just light some candles, wear more dirty layers of clothing, and live in squalor.  It worked for your charwoman ancestors.

A woman’s dream, on the other hand, is to lead an efficient, clean, healthy life, free of arrogant do-gooders’ relentless meddling.  Yet meddling is national sport for environmental elites, and their regulatory schemes steal women’s time and increase their workload and stress.

It’s time women fought back.  Politicians who promise to “drill, baby, drill” and shutter the EPA and Department of Energy should automatically get our vote.  Polar bears, delta smelt and marine sponges can fend for themselves.

And the next time the kids bring home some “Save the Planet” tripe in their school backpacks, moms, give your children an explicit lesson in pre-modernity: a bowl of Dickens-like gruel for dinner, no lights, TV, computers, cell phones or video games, and a piece of newspaper to clean up with after using the outdoor “facilities.”  And bedtime at dusk.  Hey, it’s the Neanderthals or us.