End of the World Rescheduled

Harold Camping is a man who knows how to admit error.  He ruined a lot of gullible peoples’ lives by convincing them May 21 would be the end of the world.  Now, after spending a few days reflecting, and ignoring angry voice mails from un-Raptured followers, he says he misunderstood the significance of May 21, and the real end of the world will be October 21.

I had been wondering if maybe he just got the planet wrong, and maybe we were all celebrating while some alien race was getting the crap Raptured out of it.  Perhaps our exuberance was insensitive.

But, no, it turns our exuberance was unwarranted, because we’re still hosed.  May 21, you see, was the date of spiritual judgment, which “places the whole world under Christ’s judgment.”  In other words, Jesus was called up for jury duty.

You may feel being tried in absentia like this is unfair, but remember, Christ is nearly omniscient.  The only thing he didn’t know was when God would lay that jury summons upon him.  You can’t argue your way out of judgment when the judge knows the very depths of your soul, and apparently God is no longer amused by watching us try.  It’s going to take Christ five months to process all these judgments as it is.  No point clogging up the system with time-wasting and futile appeals.

Camping is all washed up as a prophet, because he didn’t take the common-sense precaution of coating his doomsday predictions with a thin layer of junk science.  For example, Paul Ehrlich is still taken seriously as an environmentalist prophet by the media, despite having been hilariously wrong when he predicted “at least 100-200 million people per year will be starving to death during the next ten years,” and air pollution would “certainly take hundreds of thousands of lives in the next few years,” back in 1970.

The “global cooling” crowd in general gave us ten to twenty years until doomsday at best, forty years ago.  Luckily, global warming kicked in and saved us from global cooling.

Global-warming pope Al Gore makes all kinds of doomsday predictions that expire harmlessly without much damage to his media credibility.  His most recent one is that global warming would destroy mankind by 2016, if his policy prescriptions were not adopted.  Britain’s Prince Charles sets the exact date of environmental Armageddon at July 2017.  NASA’s James Hansen, one of the chief engineers of the global warming fraud, provided a far more brutal timetable by telling President Obama we had only “four years left to save the earth” in 2009.

None of these people will get the bum’s rush from the global stage by our mainstream media when their absurd expiration dates for humanity come and go.  Why be so hard on Harold Camping?  At least he didn’t try to use government power to loot taxpayers.  Belief in his nonsense was strictly voluntary.