Hillary Clinton Proclaims: I Will Be First Black Female President

The person the mainstream media has decided is the savior, or is that saviourette, or perhaps saviourelle, maybe saviourix, of the Democratic Party is…Hillary Clinton?

This is total desperation on the part of the left.  Isn’t there anyone remaining in their ranks who is younger than Methuselah, who has only one chin and weighs less than 200 pounds? 

I am not being unkind, I am being realistic.

Nobody likes, wants or knows what to do with old women or fat children.  Ergo, how must an old fat woman rate? 

So why does the left feel it has no one else but Hillary Clinton?  This doesn’t have the air of a first choice; this has the air of an only choice.  Why is she now the last best hope of the Democratic Party?  It is very clear that Democrats nationwide have deserted Barack Hussein Obama, and the lovely Marie Antoinette Obama, who hopefully will be back from the Cote d’Azur in time to vote for her husband in 2012, but are they actually willing to turn against the first black President to…the…er…wife of the former first black President? 

A fascinating conundrum, to be sure.

We are clearly the only ones willing to err on the side of reality.  “Hillary Rodham Clinton,” as my sister, a true blue Democrat liberal, despite my greatest efforts, and yet another old fat woman, therefore insignificant, except to me, once said, charitably, “…is not a pretty girl.” 

This is not only true, it is a fact that it is a real drawback in HRC’s near obsessive efforts to match and overcome the ‘successes’ of her ‘husband.’ As long as realism is the effort of the day, Hillary is working like a beaver to achieve great success after the numerous failures of her husband.  The left does not, miraculously, see Bubba’s performance as President as anything but an overall outrageous success.  Figure that one out in the reality zone we are now in.

Nonetheless, it is sad, but true, but that as a woman, if you look like Hillary, and will do so even more by the time she would run again, to appeal enough to the electorate to win the election on the part of said woman would be…er…challenging.

A man of the same age as Hillary – let’s use her husband as an example, who is certainly less worthy than his spouse; he is actually less worthy than just about anybody’s spouse – but who is nonetheless holding on to his physical appeal at a far greater rate than is she.  This is, no matter what surgical and cosmetic work has been done to the potential candidate, or will be done, nor any miracle imagined by her supporters, an appeal which Hillary never possessed, and never will.  She in fact has conveyed the opposite of her husband in this regard; people who have been drawn to him are in large part repulsed by her.

Except, of course, for other old fat women.  Aging hippies, they are often charitably called;

These and other Hillaryites need to get real about this, because it applies to their savior in any future political endeavor, whether it be in 2012 and especially 2016.  It is not just her looks that constitute a real problem for the candidate, there are other drawbacks that have to be recognized.

Is another of her problem her voice?   (terrifying)  Is it her accent?  (auditorily vexatious)   Is it her laugh?  (horrifying)  Is it her bad grammar?  (seemingly irreversible)  Is it her being a natural hater? (bitter and hateful)  Is it still her unfortunate appearance?  (God love her, she can’t do any more than she’s done)  Is it her constantly saying ‘ya know?’  (worthy of capital punishment, as far as I’m concerned)

Or is it that she is not her husband, no matter how hard Clinton supporters try? 

By jove, you’ve got it.

A combination of the above would be enough, actually more than enough, but the last is the ultimate damning aspect of Hillary’s candidacy: she is not, and never will be, Bubba Rodham Clinton.  She can figure out how to tremble her lip; she can become promiscuous (another nasty image); she can use her child and her spouse for photo ops; she can try to feel your pain; she can promise anything and everything to everyone; she can condemn George H. W. Bush and George W. Bush, and she can lie to an art form (like Bill did, and continues to do) and she will never achieve the level of connection that Bill achieved with the American people.

She will never be anointed the first black woman President.

She will, however, be as far left as Obama and Pelosi and Reid were, which the American people will agree is not a good thing.  So, she will not be Obama, which, at this point, is  a good thing. Bill will not be Michelle, which, also at this point, is a good thing, unless he goes to Marbella with 60 friends.  Hillary will not have to deal with Pelosi, which is quite a shame because that would have been so much fun to watch.

She will, however, have to deal with the newly awakened American people.  Americans now know what the left is capable of, which is the destruction of their country.  The citizenry of the United States of America will no longer accept the ‘fundamental transformation’ of their country, not from a faux, or even, a real, Bubba.


View All