Meltdown Countdown

Is Hillary heading for a Howard Dean moment?  How could that be?  She is, after all, smarter than all of us.  Or is she?  Based on the last debate — and what happens tonight — Republicans may have the greatest game films to use in the general election.  Not only for campaign commercials but also for targeting Hillary’s fuses.  Who will be good enough to make her blow her top, tonight or next year?

My law school mentor and master of the law William F. Harvey had the distinct honor of having been sued by Ms. Rodham-Clinton upon his appointment by President Reagan as head of the Legal Services Corporation.  See, Hillary had been in charge (to the extent that liberals ever are) under President Lost Ball Carter, and apparently there was so much dirt and incriminating evidence of her malfeasance in the files of the corporation that she locked the place up, threw away the key, and sued Harvey & Co. to buy time to hide or destroy it all.  Sort of like her shenanigans about the FBI files, the White House Travel Office and her time records from the Rose Law Firm, to name just a few.  When Hillary finds her center of gravity in or even close to a sling, she freaks out and does really stupid things.  But more, the Professor learned something about Ms. Rodham that has yet to get even a tincture of attention over the intervening years; turns out the former First Lady is just not the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree after all.

“But wait!” you cry — “what’s this??”  Everyone knows she’s the smartest woman in the world, possessed of near-cosmic  intuition, quick of wit, sharp of tongue (well, you got that part right, anyway) and all-round wizard of things intellectual, right?  Not so fast, Einstein.  Dean Harvey long ago declared that her much-hyped intellect has been, well, much hyped—but not so much proven.  If one bothers to read transcript of her remarks when the typical scripting has not been provided, you quickly discern that all too often paragraph 2 will bear no logical relationship to paragraph 1.  And when she’s out of her element, caught in the web of her own inconsistencies,  the ashtrays (soon-to-be-tossed) won’t be long in coming. Trust me on this one, folks, just look back at that screech she performed a while back when she got all sweaty over being called unpatriotic.  Never mind that she and that whole array of liberal wizards who look down their noses at their country so richly deserve the label, it made her madder than a crazy old wet hen.  And when that happens — and mark my words, people it will happen — she will blow like Vesuvius. 

All this leaves us to ponder the “so what” of it; well, unless the sycophants in the drive-by media can somehow cover it up or conceal it from the masses, she’ll be toast.  Just ask Howie Dean.  The Screamer self-destructed like one of those Mission Impossible tape recorders when his real, nutty self got caught on tape, and the same thing could easily happen to Mizz Clinton.  And at that moment the universe will collapse on Rush’s Breck Girl, John Edwards, as Obama-Obambi just will not play in Peoria — or much of anyplace else either.  And that is the most extravagantly good news for the rest of us, because, as the king of Class Warfare, Edwards is about as unelectable as Obama. 

Then there will be tonight’s debate — leftist vs. leftist vs. leftist, etc. . .wherein we will get our first glimpse of the former First Lady in counter-attack mode.  (“Fighting back” just has to mean at least some measure of smearing the others and of course, playing the gender card.)  One has to wonder whether, given her somewhat limited polemic skills and the absence of the omni-present scripting by the omni-present handlers, tonight might just be the night; maybe, maybe not.  But be not afraid: shrillness awaits, and whether or not Wolf Blitzer (I still don’t buy that one as a real name), Edwards and Obambi can hit the button tonight, it will happen — soon.

But assume facts not in evidence for a moment. Suppose instead that Ms. Clinton can make it through her own convention without going postal.  Then our training tape conclusion becomes key.  Every one of the first tier Republicans can and will find a way to hit her detonator during the real campaign.  She will go BOOM! almost as surely as Bill has lipstick on his shorts.  I know this because it is who she is, and I also know this because I know God loves this country too much to permit a person like Hillary Clinton to masquerade as President, particularly during wartime.  So be of good cheer, my conservative friends, fireworks await.