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Rush Limbaugh should be down on his knees each night before bed, thanking the Lord. With enemies like that, who needs friends?

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The Gang That Couldn’t Slander Straight

Rush Limbaugh should be down on his knees each night before bed, thanking the Lord. With enemies like that, who needs friends?

We certainly are hearing a lot about phony soldiers right now, and I agree — there are some. They are the phony political soldiers of the left, who seem determined to seize defeat from the jaws of victory, or at the very least, seize insignificance from the jaws of consequence. How else to explain the current lease the Excellence In Broadcasting Network has with the Democratic majority in the Senate, for publicity. Tell syndicator Premiere Radio to slash their advertising budget. The Democrats will do it pro bono, or pro Rushbo. Maybe, in fairness, Rush should give the DNC a few commercial messages during his program.

It all goes back to remarks Rush Limbaugh made terming an army war opponent who couldn’t hack basic training and then pretended to be a Ranger, and a marine pretending to be a chaplain, as phony soldiers. And so they are, virtually by definition. But to hear senate democrats, you’d think Rush had raped Lady Liberty.

He did not — did not — did not so characterize all military opponents of the Iraq war (a level of restraint from Limbaugh which surprises me Ann Coulter would have stopped short of nothing less than a barbed wire suppository). Limbaugh merely noted that a few people who pretend to be what they are not, are phony. Well, holy dictionary, Batman! Sounds like a working definition to me. And yet the indignation index is hitting 112 and hazardous, with calls from democrats for Rush to get the bum’s rush (which Clear Channel, Premiere Radio’s parent company, has correctly told them to stick it, sideways, without lubricant).

I can’t really figure this out. Don’t Democrats own majorities in both houses of Congress, and therefore all the committee chairmanships — virtually a Jimmy Dean franchise for pork? Don’t polls look very promising for them right now to expand those numbers next year, and maybe even elect the serial giggler with cleavage as president, while the first non-gentleman entertains all of those visiting prime ministerial wives? Call those questions rhetorical, and call the answer categorical: Democrats have every reason to be happy as Cindy Sheehan in a Hugo Chavez embrace. Things are going the way of the donkey, so why are we only seeing the donkey’s back half?

There may be several reasons for this. For one, many see this as a chance for payback from the attacks on Move On, following that contemptible “General Betray Us” ad. And as long as Democrats are held hostage by George Soros‘ checkbook, expect more such homage to Bowelmoveon.org, even from Democrats who know better.

Another reason is that Rush’s comments hit liberals where their nerve endings are most concentrated: right in their assumed moral superiority. If you look over any number of policy views which seem otherwise inexplicable, just ask this question: Does this viewpoint enable one to apply an extra layer of arrogance? If the answer is yes, ignore any associated illogic. This view will sell in circles where egos should come with labels reading “do not inflate over 30 p.s.i.”.

Right now, nothing bolsters those fragile egos quite as much as camoflage-patterned validation of their Neville Chamberlain-esque call for peace in our time. Yes, the same Democratic Party leadership which was doing a banzai charge in reverse from military service during the sixties, and which had such a contemptuous view of those in uniform during that 1993-2001 period at the white house, now can’t get enough of a retired General Wesley Clark or a John Kerry “reporting for duty”. Make no mistake about it, this Democratic Party loves our men and women currently in uniform — so much so that they’re willing to pursue policies which could kill a whole lot more of those service personnel who’ll be wearing that uniform a few years down the road. Limbaugh set off the tripwire on their claymore mine of self-delusion, and they won’t soon forgive him, or anyone who agrees with him.

A final reason for this tilting at windmills might just be recognition of the wisdom of Will Rogers when he said, “I am a member of no organized political party. I am a Democrat”. Exceptions like the Clinton juggrnaut aside, Democrats have often been easily led off message, and goodness knows Democrats ought to have better messages than this to prattle about.

This tempest in a thimble might also reflect the fact that democrats know the unfairness doctrine is going nowhere as long as George Bush as a veto pen, and probably nowhere after that as long as George Bush’s Supreme Court remains in power. The bluff and bluster could show how frustrated Democrats are that, in the Darwinian marketplace of talk radio ideas, theirs have proven to be so low on the food chain.

But if I were consulting them (oh, say for 30 pieces of silver) I’d tell the stars of “When Harry Met Nancy” to ignore Limbaugh. “Who cares what he says? He preaches to the choir. We’re in charge and the polls say we might stay in charge long enough for every parent to pick up 5 grand a kid and let the child declare his parents as dependents come April 15th.” That would make a lot more sense, but don’t expect that tactical shift as long as Democrats equate Rush with the Republican party. (Yes, I know — Rush sometimes does so why shouldn’t Democrats?) And therein lies part of their problem: Rush Limbaugh is not the Republican party. He’s a talk show host, and an advocate, and beyond that, an entertainer. His validation isn’t in election results, but in ratings, and more importantly, revenues. And whatever Democrats may think they’re doing about election results, they’re most assuredly having the (for them) undesirable effect of raising Limbaugh’s ratings and raising his revenues.

It may not be long before Rush will wonder how he ever managed to get by on a mere 35 million dollars a year plus a lifetime’s supply of Snapple. This past day I heard the whole phony soldier debate played out for an hour on a radio station WHICH CONSIDERS RUSH A COMPETITOR! Not that they wanted to. They could have ignored the story for awhile, but not now that the senate majority party is voting official resolutions.
Rush Limbaugh should be down on his knees each night before bed, thanking the Lord.
With enemies like that, who needs friends?

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Written By

Jim Bohannon is a host with Westwood One Radio whose "Jim Bohannon Show" and "America in the Morning" are heard on over 500 radio stations nationwide. He's a member of the Radio Hall of Fame. www.jimbotalk.net

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