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Virtual Fence=Virtual Enforcement

It’s funny how the “virtual fence,” a detection system to deter illegal aliens from sneaking across our border, is being used as an escape route for senators who don’t want to face the displeasing aesthetic and cultural impacts a real fence might have.

People shudder at the fact of a “Great Wall” along the southern border and think by talking up the “virtual fence” we can get all the benefits of real security, without any of the unattractive barbed wire or hurting America’s image as a nation of immigrants.

For those who want forego the provisions of the House immigration bill and deter illegals with a big, scary camera, I can do them one better.

Let’s just put some scarecrows at the border. One every 15 feet. That’ll do the trick!  And they’re even kind of cute at the same time. We could even dress them as Border Patrol Agents! Get it? They’ll be scared of the scarecrow, just like the camera because it can see them. And this will be, like, waaaay cheaper. My grandma can even  sew good costumes to help out.

You think this is silly?

Cameras, although helpful at identifying criminals are not an effective deterrent. We have cameras at every Wal-Mart, gas station and retail store. It hasn’t stopped theft.  At some intersections and stop lights, a camera can scan your license plate and send you a ticket in the mail when you get caught speeding. This hasn’t yet stopped speeding. 

Simply put, with a virtual fence, you get virtual enforcement.

There is one effective virtual fence I favor, though and it comes with an electric collar to remind Fifi she isn’t to leave the yard. But, if we go the “virtual fence” route, these lawmakers be the ones with the real shock when they end up in the doghouse after elections this fall.

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Written By

Miss Carpenter was formerly a congressional correspondent & assistant editor for HUMAN EVENTS. She is the author of "The Vast Right-Wing Conspiracy's Dossier on Hillary Rodham Clinton," published by Regnery (a HUMAN EVENTS sister company).

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