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Is God a Mexican?

President Bush met Friday with a select group of financial journalists, including Lawrence Kudlow, who reported the event on his blog.

I’m not really sure if any financial stuff was discussed at the meeting, because I just couldn’t get past the President’s stunning new theological insight. According to Kudlow, the President (our President) said he wants:

“a comprehensive immigration bill that does not include a 700-mile wall. He told us ‘immigration helps restore our souls.’”

And evidently it is only illegal immigration that can help restore degenerate American souls, since the wall, which is really just a fence, would not keep out a single legal immigrant possessing proper paperwork. I am told that the 700-mile fence will include at least one gate and a small turnstile.

Regardless of attempts to misrepresent controlling the border as closing the border, the important point here is that the President is now ascribing magical religious powers to illegal immigrants from Mexico.

WHAT? Was this meeting held in La La Land? Was there a gas leak in the room? Had the President just been punched senseless by Cynthia McKinney? Are we living in a sequel to the Manchurian candidate, El Chimichanga Candidate?

My only possible explanation is that perhaps the President –never a man gifted with words—has been misreading the Bible. Perhaps (and this is just a theory), everywhere the book refers to “Jesus”, Mr. Bush has mistakenly read the name as “Hey-Suess.”

Naturally then, he would begin to associate the power of Jesus to restore men’s souls with the entire Mexican nation. This theory would also explain why Mr. Bush apparently wishes to import the entire Mexican nation.

You see, this is what happens when the President is told not to move his lips while reading. Will someone please get this man a “book on tape” version of the Bible? Hey-Suess Christ!

(Hat tip to “lonewacko” for noting the President’s Nuevo Testament)

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Mr. Johnson, a writer and medical researcher in Cambridge, Mass., is a regular contributor to HUMAN EVENTS. His column generally appears on Tuesdays. Archives and additional material can be found at www.macjohnson.com.

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