Great news for the Egyptian theocracy, courtesy of the UK Guardian:
US Secretary of State John Kerry on Sunday rewarded Egypt for president Mohammed Morsi's pledges of political and economic reforms by releasing $250m in American aid to support the country's "future as a democracy".
[...] Egypt is trying to meet conditions to close on a $4.8bn loan package from the International Monetary Fund. An agreement would unlock more of the $1bn in US assistance promised by President Barack Obama last year and set to begin flowing with Kerry's announcement.
"The United States can and wants to do more," Kerry said. "Reaching an agreement with the IMF will require further effort on the part of the Egyptian government and broad support for reform by all Egyptians. When Egypt takes the difficult steps to strengthen its economy and build political unity and justice, we will work with our Congress at home on additional support."
But... but... I thought we were totally tapped out. Cutting one single dollar from Obama's non-budgeted federal spending would mean pay cuts for hard-working janitors, who would go insane sitting in 90-minute takeoff queues at airports while attempting to fly home in shame, only to be killed by bacteria from un-inspected meat, but on the bright side their bodies would be incinerated in house fires that we can no longer afford firemen to extinguish, so at least the infection wouldn't spread.
Recapping his meetings with political figures, business leaders and representatives of outside groups, Kerry said he heard of their "deep concern about the political course of their country, the need to strengthen human rights protections, justice and the rule of law, and their fundamental anxiety about the economic future of Egypt".
Those issues came up in "a very candid and constructive manner" during Kerry's talks with Morsi.
"It is clear that more hard work and compromise will be required to restore unity, political stability and economic health to Egypt," Kerry said.
What about the people experiencing "fundamental anxiety" about the economic future of America? When can we expect some "hard work and compromise" to "restore unity, political stability, and economic health" to our government? And who bails us out when our rickety, insolvent system begins collapsing?